Heal A Broken Heart

Everyone, to a greater or lesser extent, has had the feeling of being heartbroken at one time. This experience of missing something important can happen in many situations, not just in love ones.

Some may have fallen in love with someone who didn’t love them back, others experienced how their important love relationship came to an end, or they may have come to feel heartbroken at the loss of a very dear friendship.

People describe heartbreak as a feeling of sadness, bitterness, disillusionment, emptiness, pain.

I met a boy who told me that he hadn’t been able to forget his former fiancée, and that even though he knew there was no chance of getting back together with her, he wouldn’t be with anyone else again. This was a symptom of her refusal to heal her broken heart.

As much as we go through these bad situations, it is always possible to start from scratch. But for that you have to be willing to do it and take the necessary steps.

If you close yourself off in your sadness and close your heart, you will have let a bad experience spoil your entire future love life.

I started to inquire into his thoughts, asked him to tell me why I thought he would never find another girl to share his life with. If erroneous thoughts are not eliminated, it will not be possible to move forward.

I’ll never find someone like that

This kind of thinking is universal and totally wrong. If you’ve met people in love who have lost what they had, or you’ve lived it in the flesh, you’ll see that many say this phrase: “I’ll never find someone like that”.

Of course, where there is love is the certainty that this person is unique in the whole world, and that you will never like another person. But this is a very wrong thing. As time goes on eliminating feelings and you meet new people, you will realize that there are many types of people and it is possible that you will find someone similar to what you wanted.

The guy I talked about earlier told me, “There’s no one like her.” Of course we are all unique, but the profile of someone who fell in love continues to exist in more people. I asked him, “Since your relationship ended, have you met any other girls?” , and he said to me: “No, I don’t want to meet anyone else, because there isn’t one like her”…

We clearly see that the problem with thinking that there will be no one is with ourselves. If we don’t do anything to keep meeting new people, we won’t be able to find other people we might like. Of course there are people we might like, but you have to open up and try to get to know them.

If we do nothing, the mistaken phrase that we will never meet anyone like that will be fulfilled, but it will be because we have closed ourselves completely.

What can we do to ease the pain of a broken heart?

It is important to make the decision to leave the memories behind. Do not look at your pictures, or leave objects on display that remind you of the other person, or contact them by any means, not by internet, SMS, telephone, etc…

The phrase: “with your hands full you will not be able to receive anything new”  is the purest truth. If you’re still in contact with the person you care about, you won’t be able to have eyes for anyone else, so make the decision to “close the door” and let the new one come through.

There is no better remedy than keeping your mind busy, especially doing the things you enjoy. It is forbidden to do nothing, because lack of action brings frustration. So, even if you don’t have things to do, go out to play a sport, occupy your hours with some course, activity, outing, etc…

Social relationships bring a lot of gratification. If you meet new people and run into the right people with whom you have a connection, you will find that life can always start from scratch and the best way is to start with your social relationships.

It is a very important part of recovering from emotional pain. When the heart suffers, we go through greater stress, so we need to take care of ourselves more than ever, adopting a healthy life with a balanced diet, good rest with stable schedules and regular exercise.

Everything in this life is fleeting, and emotional pain would be no different. Keep going on your path even if you are heartbroken, carrying all this pain but not stopping walking, patiently knowing that it is something fleeting that will heal over the days. Embrace acceptance knowing that life is like this: sometimes it’s wonderful, but at other times you have to suffer.

Be careful not to mask the pain

Many people feel unable to face the pain that comes from a broken heart face to face. Thus, they fall into alcohol, drugs, start to have unbalanced rhythms of life, eating poorly, etc…

All these bad attitudes are nothing more than evasion of reality. In this way, the pain will not heal, but it will mask and destroy you little by little.  Not only will you continue the emotional pain, but you will have added more problems that will harm your health.

The smartest way to get out of emotional pain is to face it in a healthy way:  taking care of yourself, accepting, opening new doors and letting the pain weaken as the days go by.

Those who decide to face the lack of love are braver than those who resort to an unhealthy life to mask the pain.

In addition, whoever manages to overcome a broken heart in a healthy way, taking care of their health and accepting this negative situation, will have acquired tools and  learning that contribute to their personal development and emotional stimulation.

Images courtesy of Seyed Mostafa Zamani and D. Sharon Pruitt.