There Are Those Who Are Afraid Of Change: I Am Afraid That Things Will Never Change
There are square minds that fight for nothing to change, so that the entire structure doesn’t lose any of that decaying oxide patina. I, on the other hand, do not fear changes: I await them with the maturity of someone who knows that nothing that arrives is eternal, and that nothing that goes away is totally lost.
If we look for a moment at most manuals on mental health or self-help, we will see that there is one type of message that predominates over the others. “Change to improve your life”, “Change causes fear, but sometimes they are necessary”. However, the fact that the idea is often repeated does not imply that it is applied as it is actually necessary. People, believe it or not, are stubborn and very reluctant to change.
Sometimes we prefer to live in familiar areas regardless of whether they make us happy or not. Because crossing the boundary of the known is entering the swamps of fear. What if I run into something worse? In the end, many tell themselves, a known and assumed unhappiness is always better than uncertainty itself. Resistance to change, as we see, has deep roots that raise a dense, chaotic forest where sunlight no longer enters.
However, those who are able to go beyond the boundaries of fear provide something akin to a quantum leap. It is an intense and revealing sensation where we suddenly become more receptive to everything around us. Ideas flow more easily with this change and a thousand possibilities open before us. A thousand paths full of light.
The changes and detachment
There is a curious fact that we are not always aware of. Throughout our lives we take on a multitude of small changes that, without realizing it, make a considerable change. We change aspects of our personality in response to certain facts or experiences. We adapt or even develop new behaviors to consolidate relationships or to avoid aspects that have hurt us at some point.
However, when we look back and realize that we are no longer the same person we were a few years ago, we give this feeling a name: “crisis”. This subtle detachment from the “I” of yesterday causes fear and anguish, because we don’t quite know what this “I” of the future will bring us.
A change always implies a detachment from something, there is no doubt, and this generates fear. However, nothing goes away entirely because what we do is transform ourselves. We expanded areas of activity and widened our interior paths to make room for much more wisdom. Because with the changes we grow, because a crisis is nothing more than an opportunity to be more receptive to.
Connect to wake up
Many people seek to create change in their lives. But, we are not talking exclusively about the need to end everything and everyone by pressing the red button to reset. We refer to the ability to generate an internal change so that what surrounds us also changes.
Some people see their own life as a constant failed project. Every time you start something, it fails. Every time you believe you have found something or someone exciting and special, it dissipates from your hands. Does bad luck really exist? No way. There is an internal disconnect. Changes should not be random like someone throwing the dice or throwing himself into a pool with his nose covered.
Because anyone who takes risks or decisions without first connecting with their previous feelings, intuition, and experience will likely end up assuming that their life is ruled by chance. For these turbulent whims of destiny that offer and take away without ever adapting to our own expectations. To our own desires.
On the other hand, we all know that changes bring us closer to uncharted territory. This causes fear and uncertainty. However, to ensure the success of this “oscillation” in our lives, we need to make this change in tune with all the dimensions mentioned above.
“I make this change because I know it’s what I need, because I know that in order to grow and allow myself to be happier I need to let go of certain things, certain people and certain scenarios.” Even so, to reach this full and true conviction, it is necessary to “wake up”.
Opening our eyes from the inside to discover the opportunities that surround us requires us, in the first place, to calm our minds. Draw power from the dragon of egos, the ghost of fear, and the drum of “what will they say”. Awakening is, above all, connecting in peace and balance with our own feelings, listening in turn to what the heart whispers.
Because there, in that space of peace, fear no longer exists.
Images courtesy of Ashley Longshore.
