What If We Teach Girls To Be Brave Instead Of Perfect?

The girls who occupy parks and classrooms today are the women of tomorrow. But before that, they are the girls of today, and nothing justifies us wanting to accelerate their childhood so that in the future they are perfect women. Prepared to be mothers, prepared to take care of the house, prepared to move in the world, prepared to be the best in their profession, prepared to manage their emotions, prepared to chew the frustration and not choke… If your head already hurts with so many demands, imagine theirs.

Childhood is not a maker of perfect women

Childhood does not exist to make perfect women. Obviously there is no father who doesn’t want his children to have the best future. That’s why they give their blood at work every day, and that’s why they look for the best teacher and make an effort to multiply the hours of the day.

The other day I read an article that said we ask children too much, and maybe that’s true, but what experience has taught me is that we listen to them too little. That they have thousands of social networks to express themselves in, but few familiar spaces to do so.

Let no one misunderstand me, it is not about them deciding, but about considering what they want now, including what they would like in their future if we give ourselves the power to make decisions for them: if we assume this right and this obligation, we cannot ignore the responsibility we have acquired before them. It is not about consenting, but about integrating and helping them to discover for themselves where they want to go. I’m talking about something that has nothing to do with parents being more or less strict.

If we want to teach them something, let us teach that perfection does not exist. That throughout their lives they will have to face fears, and that the courageous ones are not the ones who don’t fear, but the ones who put them aside and overcome them. The ones who do it all the time while watching, sideways, as these fears grow small.

The perfect girls don’t exist, but the brave ones do

Let’s teach them that perfection doesn’t exist, but that fears multiply as we move forward: on the starting square, there is usually much less to lose than on the following squares. Let’s tell them that there are victories with prices that aren’t worth paying, because it’s not worth being the most popular if the price is harassment, mockery or insult.

Let us show them that before taking any opinion as their own, it is better to put it to trial. Even if this implies that they do the same with our opinions and that we have to devote more time to expose them. Let’s not show that vulnerability makes us weak, because the armor of people we love only pulls us away from them.

Let us teach that they have great power. Cutting off a love relationship at the first sign of abuse, breaking down a door and intervening if they feel someone is in danger, saying ‘no’ when they receive a suspicious invitation. Let us teach that freedom does not mean anarchy, and that he who fears it does not do it for our good, no matter how many voices he may be accompanied by.

Let us teach that if you combine your power with your courage, you will become people who are worthwhile, and that as long as you become those people, you will be just a person who is worthwhile. Because the ‘while’ counts, counts so much that if you stop to think, everything happens while we die, while we live… and in that time, rich in perspectives, something happens: happiness has a strange sympathy for people who are worth it.